Final Final


July 27, 2009

Bob Naquin

So I have traveled 5,000 miles by car and 5,500 by Recluse and I am safely back home. I have traveled 2100 miles in the last three days and that is a bit much.

Casa Bob is just like I left it. It still smells new. It was a cool 82 degrees when I walked in although the AC had been off for a month and the temperature had been over a hundred for a week. I have washed the Recluse and its trailer and everything is where it should be once again.

Since I have been gone I have been traded to another softball team. I fell more passed around then a whore when the fleet comes in. I am not sure it is because they want me or because there just isn’t anything better.

I found cold beer and chicken broth in the refrigerator. I am on my third beer. No broth. Yet.

So thanks for coming along on my little trip. I enjoyed it. I need to rest up before the next one though.

Here are some thoughts

Last year when I traveled, I made a point of staying in offbeat motels. This was mostly because I am cheap but I liked the idea of staying in non chain places. This year I stayed in mostly mid grade chain motels. While these were about twice as much in cost, the quality was on par with the non chains or less. While the Mom and Pop motels were not as modern they were much better kept and in much better repair. In one chain motel, the most expensive, I was checked in by an addict who I thought was going to implode with the stress of checking me in. I don’t think I was ever checked in by anyone who was NOT tattoed or pierced in visible places. I don’t want to know about the tattoos and piercing in places I could not see.

So the bottomline is that Quality Inns aren’t, Days Inn are out and Best Western really are better out west. The best hotel I stayed in was about $140. The worse hotel I stayed in was about the same. They should make a horror movie in the motel I stayed in in Galveston.

In California truck traffic and vehicles pulling a trailer are limited to 55 mph. This means everyone in this category drives 62 mph. Cars are allowed to go 70 mph which means that they drive 77 mph. This mph difference makes for some chaotic passing of vehicles and jam ups when a truck doing 62.2 mph tries to pass one that is doing 62 mph.

In New Mexico and Arizona everyone is allowed to drive the same speed. This makes for a much more even flow of traffic and in my opinion a much safer drive. The limit in these states is 70-80 mph and no one speeds. Everyone drives 77 mph

In Texas the speed limit is 80 mph and everyone drives 77 mph. Maybe they shoot speeders there.

Conclusion: There should be a national speed limit of 77 mph since that is what everyone drives anyway. Then we could lay off all of the highway patrols. We could use the money saved to bail out some deserving auto or banking company.

Food is better in a Mom and Pop diners. But you had better bring an appetite. Food is even better yet if you catch and fix it yourself. Failing that get your sister to do it. All food in Louisiana is better. Chain food places should be banned as part of health reform.

Ice cold beer should be available whenever and wherever the temperature is over 90 degrees as part of health reform. The availability of beer is inversely proportional to the number of Baptist churches in the area. I am sure that Jesus would have wanted a cold one after a day of preaching. I would have liked to have given him one.

WWJD: What would Jesus Do? He would have a beer.

WWJBD: What would Jimmy Buffet do? Probably the same.


It rains twice a week in Florida. The first time for three days and the next time for 4 days. At least it is a warm rain. I have no idea how people get a tan here. Maybe they just rust. It rained on me five times in one day which is my personal record. I am not talking about little spritzy rains either. Five minutes of these rains and the water is coming out of the top of my shoes. Better than the heat in some respects.

The heat East of the Rockies is pretty incredible. Hot and humid. I have figured that the humidity adds about 10 degrees to the actual temperature. So 95 feels like 105. And that would be in the shade. On a motor bike one is always in the sun and that probably adds another 10 or 15 degrees. Hot Hot hot. It will suck the moisture right out of your body at 70mph. This is why I drink so much beer on these trips. I don’t normally drink beer at all. (Lord please don’t strike me down for lying)

On the other hand, 111 degrees is hot. I don’t care how dry it is.

The Recluse has behaved admirably on this trip. It blew an exhaust header gasket on about the first day and I have just lived with it. This gasket makes the engine run kind of knarley in the 4,000 rpm range. It is blown out more than it is in place so I recognize the symptoms. I will make my own gasket. My steering has been recalled while I was gone. I have had serious problems with this in the past but none on this trip. They have recalled all 10,000 Spyders for this.

The bike still draws a ton of attention. It is amazing how many people come over who have never seen one. Kids are just enthralled by it. I believe that they thing it is a real life transformer. People in cars pass me and give me the thumbs up. Probably encouraging me to stay out and get heat stroke.

There were no bugs on this trip. Last year I had to stop once an hour to clean my face shield. This year I hardly ever used my face shield because of the windshield, but there were no bugs on the bike either. Maybe the bugs find it too wet here. Or too hot.

Margaritaville is where you make it. I make mine wherever I am. You should too.


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