R.O.C.K. Day 2011
There is this thing I get involved with every year called R.O.C.K or Recreational Opportunities for Cancer Kids . It is actually run by friend Alan, and I believe that I am the only one he knows who is willing to act the fool for a bunch of kids. And I am. Willing I mean. Probably a fool too judging by this picture.
Alan always has a theme and a skit for these outings. This year’s them was ‘Vikings’ and the skit had to do with Eric finding his long lost lover Helga out on the California Delta.
‘Alan: How do you know she is in the Delta?
Eric: A combination of many things. The study of the navigational gods, the calling of the wind, the harmonious feel of the landscape.
Eric: That and I recently reconnected with her on Facebook. She’s got a great page. Over 600 friends. Many of them are named Lars. She recently sent me a bushel of corn on Farmville.”
First we fed them breakfast complements of Village West Yacht Club and then we loaded them onto boats, now called longboats, and we headed out to Waterski Island. There we had them decorate their hats and get ready to do battle with whatever dragons that might appear. There is apparently an infestation of dragons out on Waterski Island.
And as always there is one child that adopts me and this year it was five year old Ayla. Ayla is the cutest thing with a sparkling personality and she thought I needed help with everything. Ayla also has a tragic birth defect of which she is completely unaware so she could still wield a sword with the best of them
Once the little farmaors, that is Viking for sailor, were outfitted they practiced their fighting. We did not ask them to do this but they had a grand time trying to stick each other with their nerf swords.
After they had practiced for a while we went off around the island looking for Eric’s long lost love Helga. We eventually found her but as these things often do she had had a sex change operation that had gone bad and now she/he was Lars the Imposter. Of course we had to punish Lars with the most deadly of all Delta weapons, the water balloon. Kids REALLY like throwing water balloons at adults.
We punished Lars and took his booty from him which happened to be a stuffed animal for each of the kids. I don’t think Lars minded as he just looked kinda hot in that dress and wig.
Once we had completed our mission Eric the Red went and changed into Bobby The White. As Eric, the kids would follow me around like I was the Pied Piper. Once I changed into shorts and a t shirt they either did not know who I was or were not interested. They were more interested in poking each other with their nerf swords and beating the bushes for dragons. They really wanted to kill a dragon.